After a bit, your smartphone isn’t just the extension of your arm, it becomes your best friend – it entertains you, it keeps you in touch with the news, it tells you brilliant new things, it makes you laugh, it lets you play… and unlike all the annoying human beings that surround you, it even shuts up when you tell it to. And yet a phone can be very annoying too. Phones can be frustrating, annoying, bugging – how many of these are your Pet Phone Peeves?
1. It Rings When You Don’t Want It To
Of course your mother will ring when you’re trying to impress this girl you’ve finally managed to ask out for a coffee. And Why O Why did you pick that cheesy ring tone for your mother’s calls – now she’s looking at you all funny!
2. It Never Rings When You Really Want It To
Your old class mate (the one you never wanted to meet after class X) met you in the mall and has been jamming you with useless reminiscing for the past half hour. Where’s your boss’s intrusive and importunate phone call when you really need it!
3. It Doesn’t Fall Gracefully
Phones find ways to fall, to slip from the hand, they leap out of your hand and bang into walls as you’re just walking by… they are also very, very attracted to water it would seem. A scratch on your new smart phone is a scratch on your heart. The screen cracked…. Aaargh! So much for the so called retina display.
4. It Runs Out Of Juice
Important interface with future boss, level 6 million or whatever in your fave game, the middle of a long text message that you’ve laboriously typed – your phone’s battery dies. But you have that portable power-bank now? Sorry didn’t hear you? Oh you forgot to charge that as well. Bummer!
5. It Auto Corrects
You try to type shirt it assumes you’re saying shit, you want to type Pringles it helpfully makes it pregnant, you wanted to say kayak but it came out cock, visiting became fisting … the list goes on.
6. It Has a Big Screen
That’s a good thing right? Well yes and no. you enjoyed watching the movie last night on that beautiful AMOLED retina display screen, but you cannot sit in the airport lounge and look at dirty pictures. You cannot read naughty jokes in public and viewing porn on the bus? You’ll probably get arrested! MLAs lose their job after all!
7. It Distracts You; Its *&^%ing Dangerous!
You’re trying to listen to your mother as she talks about an upcoming wedding but your friend just texted you this badass joke. You’re trying to keep your mind on the road as you drive but that beep… (Its him, its him; he’s messaging!) And you just have to have to have to check it out. Both could be potentially life threatening.
8. It Make Camp Loyalists Out Of All of Us
My Smartphone is
stronger better than yours. My Galaxy’s Bestest; Mac people are elitist morons! My Apple iPhone rocks – you Android Idiots don’t know what you’re missing! Sigh! I heard it! Heck I said it (that first part about Galaxy being best because I think my Samsung Note beats the pants of iPhone- so there!)
9. Your Phone Is More Annoying That Mine
If I’m texting while you’re speaking with me, I’m just multitasking. If you do the same, you’re being rude and antisocial. When my phone rings in the movie theater it’s because my work is so important; when yours does, you’re just being thoughtless and selfish. When I do group selfies I am being seriously cool; you just look lame.
10.My Smartphone Is The Best Until…
…The next model, the next software update the newer sleeker handset comes long. We may all be very loyal in real life, but we tend not to extend that same courtesy to our phones. We all want the newest, the fastest, the shiniest, the most loaded phone… until something shinier, newer, faster, sleeker and more fully loaded comes along, that is. That is Note 3 Samsung’s flagship device. One already has one’s beady eye trained on Galaxy Note 4 to be released later this year.
By – Reena Daruwalla