Our past, it is not just four letter word, it does have hidden pain vs. Happiness. It does have dark shades & pleasure corners a life’s essence. We often try to detach past from ourselves, but why we should do this, happiness are meaningless until it hasn’t seen sorrow/pain, here we try to attempt how to deal with it, this is a learning exercise to be with pain vs. happiness.
When we say; we want to forget our past; that itself shows there is something which we are unable to forget but don’t want to recall it either, we just want to push back those events & indulge in other issue/priorities. It’s all in our memories; all bitter/sweet experience and moments, which makes our ‘YAADEIN’. When we are free and ready to go back in our past, we turn pages one after other and relive those events as long as we can bear it. Those memories bring smiles/tears at the same time. Yes, we don’t want to recall bitter moments, but can we separate it from our past? No way!! I think if we have to be on the ground, we should learn to manage equal importance of both the experiences from past. It’s like as I just want to taste only sweetness, but how long I can? One day I will get bored on a road of happiness, human needs changes and that’s life.
I feel life itself is beautiful/cruel –‘You name it as you want’, it has divided into stages, process of feelings & different needs at regular intervals, which ultimately pushes one thing to give away place to next stage. This chain process is also applicable for various relations. It is simple yet complicated.
It’s all matter of feelings. We cannot bind anyone to make love/hate/forget/remember us, these feelings emerge within our heart with various dimension & degrees yet in different level among all individuals. The purity of words we can feel otherwise one can find avoidance even in voice/words.
Why past become unbearable when we get hurt by someone. So if u have loved someone, to a person rather for any materialistic quality ‘Give a thought why you have loved him/her, what makes you him/her so close to your heart’ I must say don’t try to forget her/him; dare to live with that memory forever. Because it’s your past, it’s your memories, but don’t get confuse with your present & don’t mess your future relationships. What’s gone it is gone it won’t come back? We cannot forget our past, in-fact No one can do that & shouldn’t as well. Just ‘Forgive but not Forget’. What we would be if we are not connected with our past. It’s like; as if we don’t know what I am but expecting what I should be. How one can lead future without clarity of past. Even in Hindu mythology rebirth has the connection with past. ‘Karma’ itself is linked with past which connect present & future. A common phrase we say ‘Learn from the mistake of past’. How would you learn if you do not remember your past?
Our past is our assets. It’s a mixture of different feelings. How it could be so meaningless to forget. We shouldn’t do that, yes it could be bitter or sweet, a proportion may vary from person to person, but we can’t change it.
There is one nice song in Hindi
“UN AANKHON KA HASNA BHI KYA JIN ANKHON MEIN PANI NA HO”.
“WOH JAVANI BHI KYA JIS KI KOI KAHANI NA HO”.
Remember it is not necessary that whom we love, we always should share our life with them. I know it is not easy to say, but this is another side of love, its love not the business. See it is like; when we love someone it is not necessary he/she should love us back, yet we expect. We should ready to face another side of love which is called rejection like a coin has two sides, like a win or lose. I agree that; it becomes more painful when we get cheated or disrespected from our loved one on the basis of some materialistic quality; but there is nothing we can do about this, it’s not in our hand. Do not cry or feel sad about anything which is not our hands, just feel the pain and learn to live with that pain. That will make you strong. God has not assured you that there won’t be any pain in your life ever. Remember you are born ‘Earth’ you are not in ‘Heaven’
I feel there is nothing like we say, I should forget this. It is all stored in our memory bank. It’s our priorities which push thoughts/events to carry forward the process of life. Which is normal, that’s how the life is all about! Don’t forget your past, learn to be with it and don’t stop life.
These ‘Parcels of pain’ are for everyone when it will rotate everyone has to pick their own parcel so just don’t compare with anyone. Move on with a ‘Pride’.
By Rakumari Nagpal