Since the swearing ceremony of Nitish Kumar’s cabinet, the country has been abuzz with how Lalu “Fodder” Yadav has succeeded in leaving his stamp on the new cabinet.
Everywhere I go, the chai par political charcha post Bihar Elections is dominated by only one topic. How the “overqualified” sons of Lalu will handle the important portfolios served in their platter?
How will Nitish Kumar tame the baap ka laadla “Deputy CM” and Maa ka ladla “Younger” son of Lalu Yadav?
Most importantly, Can Nitish Kumar work with the same zeal and energy of before?
The hope with which I pitched for Nitish Kumar has made way for panic. If I think again, this marriage of mahagathbandhan is a political suicide. BJP supporters can cheer now. They can question my wit of throwing my weight behind a “mahagathbandhan”.
But before the guns are out for my head, here is my logic for supporting this alliance. I had a deep respect for Nitish Kumar. I still do. The way he turned Bihar into a progressive state after “Jungle Raj” of lalu is commendable. Unfortunately, he has tamely given into demands of Lalu ji.
Since Bihar will un-officially be ruled by “The extended Lalu Yadav” family, here is what the state can now see as immediate-gradual changes (depending on priority):
- Fodder’s price will hit the roof. You do not have to connect the dots for this. Fodder’s price is bound to increase with the entry of Lalu Yadav.
- The trend of Selfie will be replaced by Hugg-mes. The energy with which Lalu Yadav has hugged every political ally is worth noticing (Is kejriwal an ally? Didn’t he question Lalu’s honesty after fodder scam? Anyways all is forgiven in love and politics. AAP tards need not troll me for this innocuous statement).
Time for Modi’s Selfie campaign to move aside and make way for Lalu’s Hug-me trend.
- Bihar Cricket will have Deputy CM as the President, Captain, coach and manager. To understand this trend, you have to look at the struggle our 9th pass new Deputy CM of Bihar has had to make in his not so glorious cricketing career. This new place can be his shot to glory. He can order the defunct Bihar Cricket Association to give him all posts.
- Extortion and Kidnapping Business will see a surge. I know we are without Papu Yadav this time in government. God bless his political career. The poor guy has not won a single seat in these elections. Still, the rowdies of state need not loose heart. Where there is a will, there is a way. I am giving maximum 6 months before the “rich” of the land start disappearing.
- Education and age will now not be linked to any job selection criteria. Government will officially remove education and age as a criteria for getting jobs in Bihar. The 2nd and 3rd important ministers in government are toddlers of politics. They also happen to be not so qualified. They have shown us the way to look into “dynasty”…Oops I meant “Talent” as the criteria for sitting on a post. Age and Qualification is old school.
High time government learns a thing or two from them, Mark Zuckerberg and other young college dropouts. Let’s do away with this stupid criteria. Time to think young and beyond conventional system of education.
The way Lalu has hijacked the department allocation process from hands of Nitish Kumar is worth a round of applause. At least, he has removed the confusion on who is a politician and who is the administrator in Bihar.
We now officially know who is the unofficial boss of Bihar.
So much for dynasty politics.
Monday was “Khoon-choos ley” day.
“Jab Tak Rahega Samose main Aalu. Bihar main waapis aata rahega Lalu”
Published in indiaopines blog