Drugs are indeed alluring communicators and hence people get enchanted. But once enchanted, they befriend an imminent death for themselves.

“Oh C’mmon Aks, pull and load me in that new syringe to push 2 ml of me into your veins; we would have a pessimistic suicidal fun and you can even paint a dark image of your mind state or can write a dark song. I swear that having me will be the end of your withdrawals and chronic stomach pain.Morphine whispered it in Akshay’s mind in an exalted modulation with excitement.

“Hey Aks..!!! Wait..wait don’t shoot that artificial Opium extract, did you forget the divine trip you soar after smoking me in your Chillum, we have been together since 10 long years. I am warning you again, all Chemicals high are satanic and it is never ever a permanent solution. After all I am a herbal drug preferred by saints and sages, far better than any chemical euphoria; you and your body can even recover from the internal damages I would make therein but Chemical drug is a permanent devastation to your psyche.” A bud of Marijuana debated back boldly in Akshay’s mind.

marijuana The Inner Voices of A Drug Addict

All of a sudden, Akshay’s eyes fell on his Guitar and so badly he wanted to hit a distorted power chord then and there in agitation, in rage like a rebel but he was so helpless due to his acute stomach pain, as a withdrawal symptom. He was not even able to stand up on his feet, so he consoled himself and forgot about his musical desire.

“Psst…Psst..!!! Aks, you still have a half gram of me in your wallet. Pour me in an aluminum foil and burn to chase me into your lungs. Follow your iconic Rock star Jimi Hendrix and puke out all your pain and worries.” A conspiring third voice murmured in Akshay’s mind, trying to tempt the young lad for some Brown Sugar.

brown sugar The Inner Voices of A Drug Addict

“Dude Aks, how can you forget me ? Did you forget the aggression I give you after swallowing me?” An interrupting voice came out from Akshay’s Jeans pocket; it was the strip of Nitradiazepam 10 mg tablets.

nitrazepam The Inner Voices of A Drug Addict

“Look Aks, I seriously feel that you need a natural confidence high. Go to the ATM and withdraw your last 5k and purchase a gram of me (The SnowWhite) to sniff and snort me; with the remaining 500 bucks you can purchase a complimenting Wine.” Akshay heard a tempting voice in his head with visions of him snorting lines of Cocaine and sipping some Wine.

cocaine The Inner Voices of A Drug Addict

Now, Akshay was losing his patience with the irresistible and irritating noises in his head. His consciousness very well knew that none of his inner voices were suggesting a true solution; at max’ all of them could offer, was to elongate his sufferings and withdrawal symptoms; they were just disturbing inner voices of a Drug addict.

drug addiction The Inner Voices of A Drug Addict

Akshay became completely silent for few moments and could feel the inner stillness of the flame still burning inside. His palms became cold and he started to get goose bumps, when he realized that the inner light was gradually dimming to an end and finally faded to complete darkness. His remorseful face got hung down and portrayed the expression of a failure; co-incidentally his eyes fell upon the new set of Dispovan syringe that was lying near his legs. His trembling feet were frozen in panic and he began to sweat more and more.

drug addict The Inner Voices of A Drug Addict

“Life has really become a disastrous mess Aks, and you’re lost in this mess; made by you …Aks ! Let’s end it up all; right here…right now.” These were Akshay’s last words he mumbled to himself.

“Kiss me Dead”

Ooh.! Come death and take me,
Bake me lifeless in you;
Ooh.! Give me a freedom,
And free me from these living clutches;
Anchored and tied to life.

Ooh.! Death,
Make me asleep;
In your black winged arms.
Sing me a never ending song,
An anesthetic and anemic lullaby;
In which,
Things are silently happy;
And everything always,
Always ends well.

Wanna’ deeply slumber,
Lost in your tranquility forever;
To never wake up;
In breathing circumstances and suffer,
To never see a rising Sun,
Nothing down here, no more;
No thing and no more

Hey, I am a proven failure,
A lost battle;
A sunken ship-wreck,
A fruitless tree;
An evening dusk,
Falling as a prey;
To the darkest night.
Yes..!!! Yes..!!! Yes..!!!
I am a bullet-less pistol,
Aiming at nowhere;
But myself now,
So come death and make;
Make rapid and endless love to me;
Kiss me dead,
Bless me a sweet freedom;
Free me from,
All my fears;
Free me from,
The spirit called ‘Life’.

drug sniffing The Inner Voices of A Drug Addict

He untied and freed his long black locks and used his hair band as a tourniquet to reveal a vein on his forearm. His motion was so instinctive; without a slightest pause, he unwrapped the injection from the new packet. With something in his mind, he unhooked the torn jeans he was wearing that midnight; may be, he wanted to have once again, a comfortable and cozy final slumber. He pulled some air into the syringe to create a vacuum in his veins, so that it would choke his heart to cease the palpitation. In no time, he pricked the needle into a punctured vein and injected the voided venom in his body and it bubbled the death of a drug addict.

By Aakash Sagar Chouhan

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